Saturday, May 29, 2010
I'm still doped up and missing most of my kneecap. But I march (hobble) on in my quest to help you pick which team to root for in the Stanley Cup Final. Let's have a look at the Chicago Blackhawks.
Why You Should Root For Them
Where to start? The Blackhawks are one of the feel-good sports stories of the last few years. Remember how it always seemed like the people who hate children the most always become math teachers, and you wonder why they ever took a job working with kids? Well, you had to wonder why Bill Wirtz ever bought a hockey team. The Blackhawks owner let the team toil in obscurity, deciding it wouldn't be in the team's best interest to televise home games. Not that anyone really wanted to watch them anyway, since they were routinely pretty bad. But ownership didn't want to do anything about that either. Then "Dollar" Bill died, leaving his son in charge of the franchise and boy howdy did he turn that shit around. Games were broadcast, veteran talent was recruited, and franchise cornerstones were drafted, and soon the Windy City had a team to rally around (not Jay Cutler's). The once-proud franchise was proud again. Thanks in large part to the savvy drafting of Jonathan Toews, a sort of baby Yzerman, and Partrick Kane (who is currently cultivating an awesome Rocky V-era Tommy Gunn-style mullet), a wee, slippery sniper. The infusion of fresh blood meshed with veteran(-ish) mettle from Brian Campbell and Patrick Sharp among others. But the key word is 'young.' Because there's the blistering, young defense of Brents Sopel and Seabrook and Duncan Keith. And a passal of nasty power forwards like Kris Versteeg and Dustin Byfuglien. Plus, there's Antti Niemi, celebrating his Vicky Lester moment in goal. It's a team that should be good for a while, so you might want to latch on now. And, because it must be said, not only do the Blackhawks boast one of the best logos in sports, they are also much better looking than the Flyers. If that matters to you.
Why You Shouldn't Root For Them
Well, there are some behavior questions for the team. Patrick Kane, their young star on offense, was arrested last summer for punching out a cabbie over pocket change in Buffalo. No, I didn't make that up. You'd be hard-pressed to pull a story that douchey out of your ass. Baby Yzerman Jonathan Toews was arrested a few years ago for underage drinking, which--shocking! Who doesn't wait til they turn 21 to drink in this country? Scandal!! Though, realistically, one would expect a Baby Yzerman to have wits enough not to get caught. Then there's Marian Hossa, who's come off as a gormless, craven Roger Clemens-type; eager to win a Cup no matter the team. Otherwise... not much to say. These are two tough-to-root-against teams. Neither is truly deplorable if you are not from the New York tri-state area, in which case, you're going to root against a Philadelphia team no matter what. So, take your pick.